I Was Alone. There I sat and I was alone. I was just taking a moment to breathe in the fresh air. Quietly listening to the sound each passing car makes. I felt the velocity of the wind as each car sped by. The splashes the tires made as they entered into the parking lot and passed through the puddle at the entrance. The sound of the drill as the mechanic tightens the wheels of the car hoisted up in the garage. The loud buzz of the motorcycles exhaust as it zooms by me.
The conversations of many. A woman and her partner talking about letting go and Jesus. I feel the heat beam on my pale sensitive skin, even as I sit under the black umbrella. I take a breath. Inhale. The air is filled with so many different sensational aromas. The sweet quiet sound of the birds chirping through all of the chaos as I see their little wings flutter and sputter through my peripheral view. I am in awe, but most importantly, as the soft subtle breeze brushes my cheeks, I am at peace, the peace of living.
I was alone.
There is something courageous about being alone. By alone, I mean not just without another person with you, but really being still. In the peace and quiet, alone with your thoughts. We tend to fill all of our moments with distractions, people, television, social media. Because when we are alone, like I was alone, we have to be real, honest, vulnerable, with our thoughts. Sometimes, those thoughts are what we avoid because they say so much about who we are, what we want, what we need, our satisfaction, our dissatisfaction and so much more about our feelings.
In those quiet moments, you can find a peace, a living, breathing peace within. I was alone, but God was with me as near as the air that flowed in and out of my lungs. Thoughts pondered, thoughts wandered, I giggled as I heard the bird chirping and fluttering by, I closed my eyes and took a breath and I smelled delicious food from different restaurants in my surrounding, I took the time to enjoy each bite of my sandwich, everything seemed to move in slow motion.
“Worry Less, Live More”
As I walked out of the door this morning to head to church, I tried to get someone to come with me, my invitation was declined. The service and message moved me. As our Pastor led us in prayer he asked that we all join hands. I gripped the hands of two strangers and felt the pull that they needed the spirit as much as I did. We prayed, the tears flowed from my eyes and down my cheeks. The woman to my left , handed me a tissue and embrace me. “God Bless You.” Then, even as I left, I tried again to get someone to go with me to Starbucks so I wouldn’t be alone, but my invitation was declined. I had no idea what was in store for me.
“For I know the plans I have for you” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”. Jeremiah 29:11
I am so thankful that God made it so I was alone. God fed my heart, mind, body and spirit, and he restored me from the abuse of the week. I found peace, the living peace, when I was alone.
I even sat and read the first chapter of Holley Gerth’s Fiercehearted. I paced myself because the mantra alone shook my spirit a bit. In those quiet moments, so many thoughts came to mind, the good, the bad, the ugly and the Fiercehearted.
[Self Love/Self Care/Journaling Prompt]:
This week I want to encourage you to be alone. To sit in quiet silence. To take in the atmosphere around you. Breathe in slowly. close your eyes, what do you hear? What do you smell? Ask for God’s spirit to speak to you? What do you hear now? Journal that moment. I was inspired by not just by the service, the people, the prayer, and the atmosphere, but also by simply being alone with my thoughts.